HSPVA Withdrawal

Note: HSPVA is my old high school, The High School for the Performing and Visual Arts

HSPVA Withdrawal affects over zero teenagers each year. Signs of HSPVA Withdrawal include:

– constantly surfing pva02.com
– standing in front of your microwave for 20 minutes before each meal, pretending to be in line
– purposefully de-tuning your piano
– holding “rehearsals” with your stuffed animals and calling sectionals after each one
– spending so much time at Diedrich’s that people assume you’re a decorative mannequin from Cities
– identifying sentence patterns in magazine articles and TV shows
– renting Fame and refusing to return it
– chanting “Make it a great day or not. The choice is yours.”
– eating all of your meals on the floor

If you know a friend who is suffering from this condition, or you think you may be suffering from this condition, and you live in or plan to visit the greater Los Angleles area, please contact us at

Jeopardy!
P.O. Box 75
Beverly Hills, CA 90210

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